Everyone's heart sank including mine

At then, it was silence. Everyone's heart sank including mine.

I called Oo~~h Lo~~rd Je~sus. So did the news borther me? Yes it did but not in a lightning strucked way.

Then towards the end of the meeting, I got a revelation from yesterday's message. Brother was saying that in today's living many people has lost their purpose of living or has confused about their purpose of living. Therefore "working hard to make money to support the neccessities" has become their purpose of living. This is so horrifying. Imagine your existence is just to work hard to make money to pay your mortgage, your kids tutition fees, your fashion thrist, your food appetite, your travel lust ….. Well people may argue there are also other things like family and friends. But I would still say in the end for them is still work hard to make money for their neccessities.

OMG. I don't want this and this cannot, let me stress CANNOT be my purpose of living. There has to be something greater than this. Of course I still need money to pay rent, bills and food, and of course I need money for my family and have great time with friends. But I'm not making myself a slave to this - having have to appeal when pay rise is not treated properly, worrying what is the bank account saving interest rates now, how much pay rise do I get, how can I find better car insurance, where to compare for better bargains, how much can I spend on cloth, on food, etc…. NOOOOOO…Don't get me wrong, I work hard in my job because I respect the allocated authority by God on earth which is my boss and also I am a responsible/concern person to my job.

I really appreciate that I have this reliazation through brother's fellowship. Our existence is for God's economy. He created us not so we can live and work for ourself to have a better living standard. Gosh I'm so please to know this. That releases my stress. You maybe say I'm weak, but I'm not. My stress is released because I come to realize my existance is much better than anyone else - which I am for God's economy and for His kingdom.

Then you may ask me again, do you think it is possible to over come your need for money? I honestly say no. But when I abide in Christ, I have the abundant grace from Him. Therefore I can use my money and manage my money in a sanctifying way - which is be grateful/happy to what I receive and willing to give back to Him for the church life and be contend with what He gives me for my living, either rich or poor, I amen because it is sanctified and it is for God's economy. I ask God to strengthen my faith and be my strength and let me still rejoice and enjoy Him to fullness even if I have to starve.

This is not self comforting. This is my realization to today's living. I will abide to Him even stronger. Praise the Lord! even though there is no pay rise for us all. May you still bless the company and staffs there. Your abundant grace is enough for me. I live for you.